Onegirlswingingslow-alonewondering whetheranyone will notice her gonewhether she should go home or maybejust disappear
Kicking off National Poetry Month in the Imaginary Garden!
4.01.2018
Remembering How It Felt on Spring Days at Eleven
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Oooh I can well relate to this feeling, Marian! Beautiful work on the fibonacci form!💞
ReplyDeleteOh yes, I remember that feeling! Love the swinging "slow-alone"!
ReplyDeleteAnd I'm another who remembers this!
ReplyDeleteToo many unaccounted for disappearances.. though I do relate to the impulse. Sometimes it is very hard to stay put!
ReplyDeleteKnow what I love the most about this? It's sets a scene so cinematically. Without you giving me details, I already have them in mind. You do this so well in your work, nudge details toward me as a reader.
ReplyDeleteThis becomes doubly effective when you do choose to give me a detail. For instance in this poem, you don't tell me how old the girl is, if it's warm or cold outside, if it's noon or sunset, is she is wearing a red hoodie, or if she is kicking up dirt when her feet touch the ground. What you do tell me is that she is swinging slowly, and gives me such a glimpse into her state of mind. Love this and thanks for sharing!
Lovely. Happy Easter.
ReplyDeleteSo many children have that feeling at times. I know I did! Very recognizable.
ReplyDeleteBeing 11 is good. It's such an intense, compressed thing that it echoes forever inside.
ReplyDeleteLuv her preoccuption in "swinging slow alone" an excellent and dramatic scene is set.
ReplyDeleteMuch😇love
I've asked myself those questions but never did I answer. Nicely written. Really nice prompt too. I didn't do much for it but I've been time limited lately.
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I relate so well to your poem. I can remember exactly those days,, wonderful read,,
ReplyDeleteI remember being that girl singing alone - the addition of the adverb 'slowly' says so much, as do the final words.
ReplyDeleteon the cusp - the edge - of the upswing, down - free falling into the moment, slow - and the wish as changes happen, as life unfolds, to be teased and teasingly curious, to be unique, yet wanting to disappear - layered so beautifully!
ReplyDeletePowerful vignette
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