Jangle of Nerves

Friends, Listen To Your Mother Providence is tomorrow! And I might be freaking out a little. Okay, more than a little. I’d describe myself as a jangle of nervy energy right now.

Why the janglyness? Why the nerves? I’m not hugely nervous speaking in front of an audience, usually. And I wouldn’t describe what I’m feeling right now as that kind of nervous. It’s more about the tremendous wonderfulness of this event. About the incredible talent and heart of the fantastic women who will be telling their stories on that stage. About the emotional bigness of it all.

In case you missed it, here’s the poem I wrote after our rehearsal last weekend (called “and this is only rehearsal”):

How strange

to stack up my stories

side by side the words

of women unlike me

yet like,

their stories not mine,

yet mine--

How wonderful to wrap

their words around my words,

struggles alongside mine,

another mother’s hopes

and fears

twined round my heart--

They call that an a-ha,

that moment

of profound

yet simple recognition--

yeah I get that,

it’s like that for me, too--

I won’t soon forget.

I feel a little like I’m cheating by going up there and reading my poems. I mean, I did not write a memoir piece specifically for this event like my comrades did; I brought “mommish” poems I had already written. I’m not going up on a stage to read a memoir of my children, of myself, of my own mother, of motherhood--as these brave women are doing.

Except, who am I kidding? I am doing EXACTLY THAT. These poems ARE memoir. I’m telling my story. Light bulb! Aha!

So, I am a little nervous, and more than a little excited, and I haven’t figured out what to wear yet, and the whole thing is a big road-trippin’ ball of goodness tomorrow. Headed to Providence. If you are anywhere nearby (I mean c’mon, I’ll be driving two hours to get there, so you can, too) I really encourage you to come to the show. It is going to be amazing, truly. Get your tickets here. I'm so full of gratitude for being a part of this incredible moment.