1.25.2013

alibi

If anything could turn me
into a praying woman,
it’s the fear
that you
could become so separate
from me
that I don’t know you
but don’t realize
I don’t know,
your secrets locked,
combination protected,
too obtuse
to be decoded
even after
it’s too
late.
here is the church
here is the steeple
open the doors
and see all the people
My love, I will learn
how to kneel
by your bed and pray,
seek absolution,
give penance,
flagellate,
whatever it takes
for you to live
a singular
truthful
life.
My love, my love
Be careful,
be well,
safe,
be.
here are my hands
here are my arms
my heart resides
inside your words


 
My occasional music prompt to the Real Toads is up today. Join us! We are being inspired by the music of Minneapolis-based rapper and singer Dessa.

16 comments:

  1. "your secrets locked,
    combination protected,
    too obtuse
    to be decoded
    even after
    it’s too
    late."

    Marian!! I love this part and ALL!! Especially the "A" sound in pray and flagellate!! Excellently written, Marian! Thanks a bunch for the challenge!!

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  2. thank you!
    maybe it's weird but in addition to Dessa's song this poem came from feelings i've been carrying around since watching a gut-wrenching Australian mystery/horror movie last week. it's called Lake Mungo. argh, it has really stuck with me.

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    Replies
    1. hey, also FYI if you are interested in that movie DON'T look at the Wikipedia entry! spoiler alert, right up top! safe to look it up at IMDB, which refers to it as "a supernatural drama about grief." yes, that is exactly what it is.

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  3. It scares me how much people in general and women in particular invest in their significant other. It invites wholesale devastation should they prove to be untrue, but how else can one love if not wholeheartedly? Your words really brought this conundrum to the fore, especially the opening stanza, and the commitment to prayer in the stanza after the refrain.
    This challenge has inspired such intriguing poetry.

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    Replies
    1. i was thinking of my kids, really my daughter, when i wrote this :)
      not that it couldn't be read the way your read it. well, obviously. hah!

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  4. This is so well expressed. It is scary to love someone so much but, as Kerry says, how can one love, if not wholeheartedly? I especially love "if anything could turn me into a praying woman".......and also here is the church, here is the steeple..........cool poem, kiddo.

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  5. I like reading all the neat poems that have come from your prompt--including your own. It is indeed scary to love this much, to have this breathless need not to lose someone. The price of love perhaps.

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  6. Very scary, especially these lines...
    "so separate
    from me
    that I don’t know you
    but don’t realize
    I don’t know"

    K

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    Replies
    1. yes, that's what scares me, for sure.

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  7. It is a blessing behind many a tragedy that we cannot read each other's insides and deeds . . . you truly capture this here in the child church/steeple image/sense that all will be visible. Hah! No matter how your narrator hurts the man or herself . . . what good can come of it? I guess marriage counsellors and religious guides may know the answer. I loved this insight into multi-layered domestic/violence.

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  8. I love this so much! Just beautiful and sad and fierce.

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  9. When we love with all we have, all we are...it can leaves wide open for heartbreak or create a bond that nothing can break. Love can be very desperate at times. I certainly feel that in this. Beautiful work!

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  10. May it NEVER be too late, may we always be able to read the signs of when we are needed... I thought, too, at first this was about a man (which it COULD still be) but got a LOT more out of it looking on it as a mother/daughter poem.

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    Replies
    1. :) i think so, too. of course alternate readings never occur until someone points them out, right? thank you! xo

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  11. I love your take Marian ~ I hope I can write for this later on as I am very intrigued by her music ~

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