4.08.2011

shoes #9

smoke
like a soundtrack
washing up
   over
      inside

  whispering
     infiltrating
  everything
gone and lost forever
all the world's

    camp
         fire song.

20 comments:

  1. There's real flow to this. As kind of a newbie when it comes to poetry, flow is something I've always really struggled with.

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  2. just keep writing, juice box!

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  3. I dig the smoke/soundtrack-camp fire song connection, but the title escapes me.

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  4. oh my darling, clementine
    (i was thinking juice box should know that juicy tune!)
    now you will never get it outta your head.

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  5. it bellows and rolls and flows like smoke from a campfire. i dig it.

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  6. inspiration = some thoughtless fuck
    burning who knows what in my neighborhood late last night
    smoke gets in your eyes :)
    and comes in through the walls! sheesh

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  7. The neighbors who used to live behind us (and have since moved, thank goodness) burned an old mattress one night in their fire pit at 2 in the morning. The smell woke my wife and I up. Talk about reeking! Sheesh! It felt like the stench was stealing the oxygen from the air.

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  8. on the other hand, *we* are the neighbors
    with the drum set
    and instruments that plug in to amplifiers
    that go to eleven :)

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  9. rock and roll ain't noise pollution.

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  10. Love how what usually is a powerful visual becomes a sound! Interesting poem!

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  11. Lovely use of free verse for your image explosion.

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  12. explosion! love that. thank you.

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  13. lovely imagery.
    your witty words never fail to impress.

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